{"product_id":"congratulations-on-the-big-promotion","title":"Congratulations on the Big Promotion!","description":"\u003ch3\u003eCongratulations on the Big Promotion!\u003c\/h3\u003e\u003cblockquote\u003eYou failed upward at a speed that violates physics. You slept your way to the middle. Honestly, aim higher.\u003c\/blockquote\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003csmall\u003eSatire. Extreme satire. This card describes no real event and no real person. Adult language, 18+. If you hand this to someone with no sense of humor, that outcome is entirely on you.\u003c\/small\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"HR Violation Cards","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":55301305663779,"sku":"HRV-007","price":19.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"url":"https:\/\/m5309r-4z.myshopify.com\/products\/congratulations-on-the-big-promotion","provider":"Egghead Labs","version":"1.0","type":"link"}